beauty

BEAUTY. i can hardly breathe the word, but i look for it everywhere--in people, landscapes, writing, art, food, music, and in periods of bracketed time. i cannot tell you what i mean by beauty, but the longing for it, the aching need, is constant and a primary impetus in the search for lucia.

the black sun; the art and alchemy of darkness

i went to sleep and woke up this morning hearing rain in the chilly darkness. for me the best possible weather. early morning wakefulness stretched into the luxury of floating in a day and night boundary where things are not too distinct.

with a cup of tea i walk with a flashlight out the back door to the little hut that is my computer studio. my glance falls onto an open laptop where a page from the lucia web project remains from december 23rd. i see quoted there the last words from stanton marlan's the black sun: "so our journey to the black sun ends with a whisper that began and ends in darkness, a darkness no longer light's contrary but a point of possibility in which light and dark both have their invisible origin, a simulacrum of substance in a world without foundations." see particularly chapter 4: "lumen naturae; the light of darkness itself" on google books.

here is the essential core of lucia.

neti-neti lucia

one approach to understanding or finding lucia is to image what it is not. this practice is most associated with the hindu idea of neti-neti, "not-this, not-that." one of the qualities of lucia is that it cannot be fully grasped, which means that the small self cannot contain the larger entity, which is defiantly beyond verbal or conceptual mastery.